From a quiz that helps you find out what religion is right for your body type to a do-it-yourself explainer on how to build a biological clock out of potato, Megan Amram’s “Science… For Her” is a satire about the women’s magazines we mindlessly flip through — and maybe should think twice about before buying a stack at the airport.
When she’s not explaining science to ladies, Amram is a comedian who writes for “Parks and Recreation” and puts funny things on Twitter. In her book, Amram’s not just owning the word feminism — she’s turning it on its head in the most hilariously condescending way possible.
In her book she outlines such pressing topics as: Why, Scientifically, Women Can’t Drive… For Her!
“Women are basically beautiful little birds,” Amram deadpanned to Alicia Menendez. “And you wouldn’t let a bird drive a car.”
We decided to illustrate some of the issues ladies may encounter when attempting to operate a motor vehicle. Spoiler alert, girls: There’s math involved.
According to Amran, women can’t control the speed of their cars because speed involves math and women forget all about math every time they hear a Katy Perry song.
Again, more math. Velocity measures a rate in change of speed (or something like that). But as Amran explains, how can women possibly control velocity when mirrors, gems, and Greek yogurt keep spilling out of our purses and on to the pedals? It’s impossible!
Displacement involves even more math. Like algebra. (There are fractions, for goodness’ sake!). Women can’t understand any sort of spacial reasoning. We’re too busy thinking of shoes!
Imagine the car pile-up if women start thinking of Katy Perry’s shoes while behind the wheel. Oh, the humanity!
Alicia Menendez confessed to Amran that she’s guilty of perusing the occasional Cosmo or Glamour. Amram said she isn’t immune to their charms either.
“I am a very strong feminist, but I also love nail art. So much,” Amram said. “All I want to see is how to put glitter on your nails in new ways.”
So are us gals doomed to never “have it all” if we subscribe to Marie Claire instead of Popular Science? Nah.
“The great thing about being a modern woman is you can like everything,” Amram said. “You can like feminism and you can like new capelets for fall.”