Usually, teams buy strikers to score goals. Goals are cool because they’re how you win soccerball games. But, given that Yaya Sanogo scored once in 20 games for Arsenal, Crystal Palace knew goals weren’t part of the equation.
“Strikers in the Premier League don’t always have to contribute with goals,” said Crystal Palace bossman Alan Pardew. “I think Sanogo offers a bit of chaos factor: you’re not quite sure what he’s going to do.”
I mean, you’re sure what he’s going to do in that you’re sure he’s not going to score. But sure, he does come up with creative ways to not score. Plus, this fits into Pardew’s stated goal of adding “mavericks” to his team. Shortly after his first Premier League win as Palace bossman, when Maverick Wilfried Zaha came off the bench to help overcome a one-goal deficit to Tottenham, Pardew said this:
“In this game it is not all about straight lines, eating the right food and turning up on time, you need some maverick behavior in your team and I have seen today that I have got a few here.”
He then went on to repeat the word maverick a couple dozen times.
This should go well. After all, no one is more of a maverick than Professor Chaos.