Ho boy. Pity the striker coach at Atlético Madrid.
The above is video of Fernando Torres doing his medical at Atleti. (AC Milan purchased his rights from Chelsea, and loaned him straight out to Atleti, his first club.) In it, he does little foot shuffle things (think the soccer version of hop scotch) and then someone lobs him a ball, which he is supposed to jump and head into a tiny goal. The goal frame is, what, four feet by three feet?
Anyway, Torres can’t do it. In the five times we see him try in the video, he misses four. He’s like four feet away.
I suppose we should be heartened that he actually scored one. Which is coincidentally the exact number of goals he scored during his half-season at Milan.