Norweigan sensation Martin Ødegaard is destined for mountain retreats with Pep Guardiola

They grow up so fast. When we last left 15-year-old (he’ll be 16 on Dec 17) Martin Ødegaard, he was begging his dad to let him be a usable player in Football Manager. Now, he’s on his way to becoming the most hyped child whose name I will never spell correctly without copy and paste. Everyday a star is born. Clap for him, because Karl-Heinz Rummenigge and Bayern Munich seem hung-ho about the young man:

“He’s an exceptional talent and a good lad, who is very mature for his age. We are working hard to sign him and I think we have a good chance”

The Guardiola Gang appear convinced that they can land Ødegaard’s signature. Or his dad’s – whatever works. The Norwegian youth sensation, currently with Strömsgodset, has already trained with the German bullies on a few different occasions.

The purpose of this blog post is to keep you informed. Early fan investment is critical these days. You need to know everything about Ødegaard before your friends do. When he makes the senior team in a three years, (gently) elbow your BFF in the ribs and hit them with a strong “I told ya. This kid is going to be something, especially if he can lose that reliance on his right foot”. Comments about off-foot prowess are always solid when you want to sound like you know what you’re talking about.

Pep is sure to turn this kid into video game box material. They’ll go on quiet mountain retreats where they won’t even talk about soccer. They’ll just sit with their legs folded breathing in crisp air and consider their true places in the universe.

Every day, they will reinvent themselves and their tactical approaches to life. When it’s all over, they’ll have a heart-to-heart talk, and Pep will realize that it was really Ødegaard who was teaching him.

It’ll be nice. This kid is going places.