As it stands, Sam Allardyce has West Ham in the Champions League. Fresh off of a 3-1 drubbing of Swansea City, the Hammers are sitting pretty in third place, on 27 points, albeit having played one more game than fourth place Southampton (26 points) and fifth place Manchester United (25 points). Allardyce is basically a “Based God” these days.
Prior to the weekend’s fixtures, Allardyce gave some insight into his Based God powers when he revealed to the world that, earlier this summer, he had the option to sign either Andy Carroll or Swansea’s Wilfried Bony. “It was a case of one or the other. We couldn’t do both with the budget we had.” Allardyce channeled his based godness and chose Carroll, English Zlatan of the Air, to be his savior.
Bony opened the game’s scoring, testing Allardyce’s based godness with a crisp finish.
But Carroll repaid his manager’s faith by scoring two goals, all while not getting injured.
Both of Carroll’s goals were headers, obviously, because he’s the Zlatan of the Air. Diafra Sakho scored West Ham’s third goal.
In the spirit of based godness, we set up an interview with Lil B the Based God — “mogul, first rapper ever to write and publish a book at 19, film score, composer, producer, director, photo, branding, marketing, historical online figure.”
We discovered this morning that he follows us on Twitter, so he’s clearly an expert in the game, with unparalleled insight to offer. Anyone smart enough to lecture at MIT is good enough for us.
Here’s the conversation:
Soccer Gods (SG): Based God, despite getting the 3-1 win, Sam Allardyce was surprisingly downbeat in post-game comments. That may send a mixed message to players.
SG: I’m sorry, I didn’t even ask a question there. That’s deep, though. Is the secret to Premier League success love? The English FA didn’t mention love in their DNA report.
SG: I think I understand. Roster turnover can be tough. Fans should live in the moment. You never know where West Ham could be next season.
SG: Many point to Andy Carroll as the key to the club’s success, but they’re cautious because of his injury history. How do you feel his season has gone so far?
SG: If West Ham want to…
SG: What? OK. Yeah, weather is dope. Shout out to weather.
SG: West Ham is having a great campaign so far. They’re ahead of many clubs with deeper pockets and larger international profiles. If you could deliver a message of positivity to the players, what would you tell them?
SG: That’s beautiful. Thank you, Based God.