The Morning Feed, 11/18: Condoms, Qatar, and Cops That Get Drunk

What are we reading this morning? Take a look for yourself. Here’s a link dump to go with that cup o’ joe:

  1. These chimpanzees have a better retirement package than you do.
  2. Today must be “Opposite Day.” Chick-fil-a’s CEO receives an equality award.
  3. Rob Ford tells Fox News that he wants to run for Prime Minister. Please, please, please let this happen, DinoJesus.
  4. Not only do condoms prevent STDs and unwanted pregnancies, but they also prevent crappy porn movies from being made.
  5. Guns don’t kill people. Stupid people who don’t know how to handle guns kill people. (Also, guns actually do kill people.)
  6. Remember that kid who smoked 40 cigarettes a day? He’s quit! Now he’s just addicted to junk food. Wait until he discovers gambling!
  7. He may be a smut peddler, but he’s also a saint. Larry Flynt asks court to spare the man who shot and paralyzed him from execution.
  8. Once again: Your kid isn’t a unique and wonderful little snow flake. Deal with it.
  9. The 2022 World Cup in Qatar is basically being built by slave labor.
  10. In today’s installment of “f**k the police!,” some cops are allowed to show up to work drunk.
  11. Shut up, Business Insider.
  12. Half of all teenagers are virgins. That’s good… right?
  13. Losing my religion… and my virginity. Meet the man who’s created a Rabbi-shaped dildo.

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