As previously mentioned, Dante is hot garbage. This hasn’t escaped the notice of Franz Beckenbauer, who was the opposite of hot garbage as a player. Cold recycling? Whatever. He was a good defender.
Now he’s honorary president of Bayern Munich, which lost 3-1 to Porto in the Champions League quarterfinal first leg. In the game, Dante did this:
So Beckenbauer said this:
“Well, Dante. He just needs to stop the ball. Were he from Iceland, or from the north pole, then I would say he still had his ski boots on. But like that: ‘terrible’.”
Now I’m imagining Dante skiing down the Alps. And now I’m imagining Dante fumbling knock-kneed to a stop at the foot of a mountain, and Ricardo Quaresma swooping in, spraying snow in Dante’s face.