Liverpool players put to shame by heroic free kick enthusiast

Y’all Tubes free kick enthusiast, Bas Van Velzen (also the name of the villain in the “The Fastest & Furiousest XII”) brought his skills in ball-kickery to Liverpool to challenge Anfield’s best and brightest. Mario Balotelli, Rickie Lambert, Lazar Marković and Fabio Borini attempted to go shot-for-shot with Van Velzen, but were no match – presumably because Van Velzen cheats and has figured out how to edit reality like it was video footage.

This video is important for two reasons:

  1. It reveals that Marković is clearly the low man on the Liverpool team social status power ranking. Borini hit him in the head with a ball and Balotelli playfully kicked another at him and his reaction to both was “Yup, Wednesday.” Marković probably has to sit at the front of the bus on road trips and listen to Brendan Rodgers tell stories.
  2. Mario Balotelli allowed this Bas Van Velzen guy and his teammates to take a ton of free kicks without shoving them aside like they were Jordan Henderson. Apparently, that’s a level of disrespect he reserves for the upstart midfielder, which is great, because every so often Henderson needs to be reminded that he’s only hype-cycle good, not actually good.