Sorry seemed to be the easiest word for Steven Gerrard after his impressively concise 38-second appearance against Manchester United.
It’s a measure of Stevie G’s class that he fronted up straight after the match with his mea-stampa mea culpa. No hiding, no tears, no two-part special with Oprah. Just taking responsibility for the loss, agreeing with the decision and apologizing to the fans and his teammates.
Still, while you’re in a remorseful mood, Stevie, how about saying sorry for all this, too:
- for leaving Anfield this summer to go to L.A., prompting a billion Gerrard think-pieces that read like you’re dead
- for playing like, 70 times, alongside Frank Lampard for England, yet always looking like you’d never met each other
- for failing to defy the aging process and becoming old and tired and slow
- for Liverpool not having won the English league since 1990, four years before Raheem Sterling was born
- for not playing such beautiful and transcendent soccer that the world’s terrorists renounced their arms and decided that love is the answer
- For being Chelsea’s best player on multiple – yes, multiple – occasions
and even – though this may sound radical – apologizing to Ander Herrera, the guy you stamped on, maybe?